Mad Chihuahua Attacking Tim

A rabid Chihuahua has forced itself into my life. Running around the house, it destroys vases and pictures, taking away the time that wanted to use for other things. Dirt from the vases becomes spread across the carpet. Chewed up pieces of pictures become strewn across the floor. Everything’s a mess.

Take for example the time it charged into my antique Rosalique flower vase that depicted the eruption of Mount Quetzhal. The image depicted on the vase showed the fleeing of numerous citizens from their bamboo huts as the orange comsuming glob rolled over the hills. Its lava proved to be the hottest BBQ that the villagers had ever experienced, with the entire town becoming engulfed in its fiery combustion. The fanatical dog’s charged proved just as destructive to my vase. Upon the clashing of its zealous head with the clandestine surface of the vase, the porcelain shattered into numerous pieces that flew across the room. Shards shot forth, cutting into furniture and turning my living room into a sharp bed of spikes. The dirt that was knoced out turned the ground into a miniature garden. I had become Chihuahua-ziled. Dog had prevailed over man. Wilderness had taken over civilization. Humanity fell before the onslaught of Chihuahualian vigor.

What can be done? What is there to do? Sterilization of mad canines? Imposing stronger anti-Chihuahuazilation laws? Creating a one child per family rule for Chihuahualian familial units? Though immigration of the beings have been limited to five hundred thousand a year, this does not seem to be enough. Their intolerance with not understanding the Chihuahualian method of determining rate of mass transfer in the physical sciences is unacceptable. They enforce the mastery of the incomprehensible Theory of the Miniaturization of the Dog in their biological sciences, and their teachings of Translated Barking Language verbal reasoning cannot be accurately reproducible by human throats. Though their writing samples have been simplified by the signature of a paw print, this again has been irreproducible by human hands.

We must question our acceptance of the unrelenting policies of this Mad Chihuahua Attacking Tim and the detrimental effects that they have upon the affected populations of students. Otherwise we may have a swift transformation into mindless beings yelling yahoo under a dogmatic regime.